the albums

Walking on a Flashlight Beam

Walking on a Flashlight Beam

"Walking on a Flashlight Beam"

2014
Tracklist:
  1. Shutting Out The Sun (08:40)
  2. Cold (06:58)
  3. Gutter (08:42)
  4. Stars Sellotaped (01:34)
  5. The Fear Within (07:10)
  6. Treehouse (05:31)
  7. Pygmalion’s Ladder (12:02)
  8. Sky Drawn in Crayon (04:58)
  9. Walking on a Flashlight Beam (08:11)
Additional Information

Music, lyrics
Mariusz Duda

Recorded and Mastered by
Magda and Robert Srzedniccy Serakos Studio, Warsaw, Poland
October 2013 - June 2014

Mixed by
Magda and Robert Srzedniccy, Mariusz Duda

Produced by
Mariusz Duda, Magda and Robert Srzedniccy

Illustration, design and layout by
Travis Smith

Back cover photo by
Tomasz Pulsakowski

Lyrics

1. Shutting Out The Sun

Confided inside
Every night/day
Locked in the shell
Desolate self

Lost track of time
In fanciful life
Locked in the shell
Desolate heart

Prison of my own making
Self-imposed solitude
Fortress of my own making
Within my soul
I'm fallen

2. Cold

Cold illucid world outside
Dim, amorphous silhouettes of hope
Trying to retain their shades
By praying to the sun

I press my face against the pane
Stuck inside a container called myself
Watching all these blurry faces yearning to be sharp
Hiding from the sobbing noise
And resounding laughs

But there’s something beyond that draws me in
I abandon my shelter when the crowd thins out
I go there when the warm night falls
Stay behind the yellow line
Insecure

Maybe one night
I dare to forget
I dare to try
I know you are waiting
Somewhere at the edge of us

There’s something beyond that draws me in
There’s something beyond that draws me in

3. Gutter

They crawl out from the dark
Permeate through my door
Float in the hallway
Slowly blend into the walls

In the shadow of my grief
I can hear whispered sounds
Feel a cold breath on my skin
Here they come
To assert their rights

The fear is what I need, what I need to believe
The fear is what I need, what I need to feel

And so i dragged myself
Into this gutter of mine
Where shades of prey
Feed on my soul

I crave to commit my words
To the book of stifled cries
I fell down so long ago
I don't remember now

The fear is what I need, what I need to believe
The fear is what I need, what I need to feel

And so i dragged myself
Into this gutter of mine
Where shades of prey
Feed on my soul

4. Stars Sellotaped

(Instrumental)

5. The Fear Within

(Instrumental)

6. Treehouse

I deface
All the dreams that followed
And deformed my mind
When i fell into your heaven

Now i bend the spoons
As i bend the reality
I warp the truth
As i warp the time inside my head

I deface
All the dreams that followed
And deformed my mind
When i fell into your heaven

Now i bend the spoons
As i bend the reality
I warp the truth
As i warp the time inside my head

Can you hear
All is quiet
It feels all right
I guess i fell into your heaven

7. Pygmalion’s Ladder

So maybe I shine by reflecting light
And in the world of fiction I've settled in
Condemned myself to solitude

Light and dark
My home
Despair
Laughter and tears
My voice and your touch

So maybe I'm damaged beyond repair
Asleep in my ivory-cage with shutters down
But I retrieved my dreams of us

Light and dark
My home
Despair
Laughter and tears
My voice and your touch

***

Embraced by distorted clouds
My lucid nightmare is back again
First waves of the rising tide
I run away from the flood of bile and filth
I reach out my hands to you
But I drown in the murk with my silent scream
Suddenly!
Suddenly!

8. Sky Drawn in Crayon

Finally
I feel calm
Anxiety disappeared
There's no pain at all

Finally
It went away
There is no regret
I know
I understand

I can breathe
A sigh of relief
I accept the end of my
Closed reality

I need a sky
Innocent sky
I feel like i left
My shell behind

The room full of light
Is tidied up
I drew back the curtains
And removed all my doubts

I need a sky
My moonlight and my sunset
Drawn with a trusting childlike smile

9. Walking on a Flashlight Beam

Silence
How long am I here?
No sorrow
Maybe just one tear
Frozen
Somewhere in my heart
I close my eyes
Please don't wake me up

All my nights
I lived behind the pane of glass
With my stars sellotaped
Above inside
In the midst of that
I've been searching for you
Walking on a light
On a man-made moon

I now float into
The darkest realm within
Where time never ends
It sleeps in the field of the evermore
Between different spaces
I dream where I belong
The time will never end
And I will not fear the falling anymore

All my nights
I lived behind the pane of glass
With my stars sellotaped
Above inside
In the midst of that
I've been searching for you
Walking on a light
On a man-made moon

I now float into
The darkest realm within
Where time never ends
It sleeps in the field of the evermore
Between different spaces
I dream where I belong
The time will never end
And I will not fear the falling anymore

Walking on a Flashlight Beam...
Walking on a Flashlight Beam.

Impressions

Impressions

"Impressions"

2011
Tracklist:
  1. Impression I (5:29)
  2. Impression II (4:04)
  3. Impression III (7:03)
  4. Impression IV (3:57)
  5. Impression V (5:02)
  6. Impression VI (7:33)
  7. Impression VII (3:13)
  8. Impression VIII (4:24)
  9. Gravestone Hill (remix) (3:51)
  10. Summerland (remix) (4:26)
Additional Information

Music and Lyrics by
Mariusz Duda

except

"Impression II"
Music Mariusz Duda and Maciej Szelenbaum

Gravestone Hill (remix) and Summerland (remix)
Mariusz Duda, Magda and Robert Srzedniccy

Recorded and mastered by
Magda and Robert Srzedniccy Serakos Studio, Warsaw, Poland
March, July 2011

Mixed and produced by
Mariusz Duda, Magda and Robert Srzedniccy

Ilustration, design and layout
Travis Smith

Lunatic Soul II

Lunatic Soul II

"Lunatic Soul II"

2010
Tracklist:
  1. The In-Between Kingdom (6:48)
  2. Otherwhere (2:48)
  3. Suspended In Whiteness (7:56)
  4. Asoulum (6:23)
  5. Limbo (1:53)
  6. Escape from ParadIce (4:39)
  7. Transition (11:07)
  8. Gravestone Hill (3:41)
  9. Wanderings (5:28)
Additional Information

Music and lyrics by
Mariusz Duda

except

Music in "Limbo", "Escape from ParadIce", "Transition" by
Mariusz Duda and Maciej Szelenbaum

Music in "Wanderings" by
Mariusz Duda and Rafał Buczek

Recorded and mastered by
Robert Srzednicki at Serakos Studio, Warsaw, Poland
between Jan – Aug 2010

Mixed and produced by
Mariusz Duda, Robert and Magda Srzedniccy

Photos by
Anna Panasz, www.iskra.art.pl

Back cover photo by
Wojtek Kutyła

Design and layout by
Rafał Buczek

Art direction by
Mariusz Duda

Lyrics

1. The In-Between Kingdom

(Instrumental)

2. Otherwhere

I am becoming
In the realm of unknown
Beyond unending
Time
Space
And form

I was buried for rebirth
Casting off the old
Born into the spirit
From within I come

Escape from sorrow
No beginning
No end
Return to whiteness
The new loneliness

I was buried for rebirth
Casting off the old
Born into the spirit
From within I come

3. Suspended in Whiteness

a) This Heaven
Soon after the awakening
I flew up in the air
I was a snowflake floating
Through my heavenland
As light as a feather
An ash
Like a grain of sand
From the white desert
And the misplaced time
I really need to find

I was a drop of water
From the pool of life
Since my burden's gone
I am the calm inside
This heaven makes me light

b) Don't feel alive
The sudden flashback stirs in my head
I see the boat
I see the ferryman
Recall my choice
Recall the words he said
So where the heaven am I now?
Where the heaven am I?
I don't feel alive
I don't feel alive
I feel nothing

My lips are tightly sealed
My mind is blank
And every part of me is paralyzed
The scattered bits of my consciousness
Are suspended in the whiteness
Another stage of my path

I don't feel alive
I don't feel alive
I feel nothing

4. Asoulum

I can't move
Belts are too tight
Four bare white walls
Garish light
Awake!

Welcome to my travel berth
It's about time
To cleanse all those hurts
And return

I won't go
Cause I'm in the soul asylum
I can't go
Cause I'm in the soul asylum
I can't move on
Cause I'm stuck in the soul asylum
Please don't erase my name again

Something appears next to me
I follow it
I am led to the edge of bright

I watch as this place starts to change
It takes on all kinds of different shapes
Twisted screaming faces lash out from the walls
Fear permeates through my soul
I hear the moaning
Voices from my past
I'm sinking in the sea of returning cries
For good

I won't go
Cause I'm in the soul asylum
I can't go
Cause I'm in the soul asylum
I can't move on
Cause I'm stuck in the soul asylum
Please don't erase my name again
Not again

5. Limbo

(Instrumental)

6. Escape from ParadIce

Thought I was healed
Cause I felt something different
When you took me above
To this place
Your pride
The Ice Palace stood
On the top of the mountain
You said
There are bars in the windows
But a great view outside

Help me
Help me end my lie
Cause I know I will not take it anymore
Help me
Help me end my lie
I've got a fear of heights
In this perfect world

It's time to fall

Help me
Help me end my lie
Cause I know I cannot take it anymore
Help me
Help me end my lie
I've got a fear of heights
In this perfect world

 

Thought I was healed
Cause I felt something different
When you took me above
To this place
Your pride
Everything there was so pure and ideal
You said
Look as much as you want to
Only try not to touch

It's my turn to fall

7. Transition

Swallowed up in dreams
In an empty space
I'm being carried away
Into the light

It's all hazy around
I'm filtering through the fog
Heading into
The heart of what lies beyond all time

I'm being taken along
A course I've been on before
I see nests of souls
Fireflies

Passing slowly by
And rising up higher
Heading into
The heart of what lies beyond all time

***

I had a lonely life
In my safety zone
Somewhere on the edge of the world
I was searching for myself
Watching all the others' lives
Doing nothing with my own
All too soon the life was over
And in my sunset days
Without love
With no friends
I couldn't let you come and take my soul
So after all
The last thing that I saw
Were the waves crashing violently on the shore

 

***

The darkness washed inside me
I crossed over to the other side
As my eyes adjusted to the dark
I could distinguish distant pallid light

So I went in this direction
Trying not to lose my way
And when I achieved my goal
I saw the brightness
Clouds
And all those nice memories
All those nice memories
But this special one
I'd left
Behind in the shade
In my darkest fear
And If I don't go back
I'll never find myself

8. Gravestone Hill

When they met after years
One day
They went to the hill
Where the old gravestone stood in the shade
Lonely
Admiring the city lights
They started a new life
Their love was reborn

The old gravestone
Forgotten by time
Remained in the shade

Winter came earlier
Than last year when they moved on
They returned
The whole family
Happy with memories and snow
Children were sledding
So joyful
They looked at them
Smiling
Embraced with love

The old gravestone
Forgotten by time
Remained in the shade
Alone

9. Wanderings

I am walking
Through the valley of the shadow of your name
It's been another after-life-time
Since you left me here this way
How about a little game of chess
How about we roll the dice
What can I do
Where should I go now
I want to look into your eyes

Drifting In the state of limbo
Condemned to idleness
Listen to the sound of distant memories
Passing through the white hourglass

Just wandering around

Looking for the way to my home
I've lived someone else's life
Waiting for the perfect moment
I've lost all track of time

What can I do
Where should I go now
I want to look into your eyes
Listen to the sound of distant memories
Passing through the white hourglass

In the middle of light and darkness
In the middle of bright and shade
I was trying to avoid your kiss
I was trying to escape

Now I'm the soul
Banished to everlasting wanderings

Lunatic Soul

Lunatic Soul

"Lunatic Soul"

2008
Tracklist:
  1. Prebirth (1:10)
  2. The New Beginning (4:50)
  3. Out On A Limb(5:27)
  4. Summerland (5:00)
  5. Lunatic Soul (6:47)
  6. Where the Darkness Is Deepest (3:57)
  7. Near Life Experience (5:27)
  8. Adrift (3:05)
  9. The Final Truth (7:34)
  10. Waiting For The Dawn (3:36)
Additional Information

Music and lyrics by
Mariusz Duda

except

Music in Summerland, Where the Darkness is Deepest, Near Life Experience, Waiting for the Dawn by
Mariusz Duda and Maciej Szelenbaum

Recorded and mastered by
Robert Srzednicki at Serakos Studio, Warsaw, Poland
between Jan – Jul 2008

Mixed and produced by
Robert Srzednicki and Mariusz Duda

Photo, design and layout by
Rafał Buczek

Lyrics

1. Prebirth

(Instrumental)

2. The New Beginning

I thought you wouldn't come
I have been waiting for you
In the back of beyond

3. Out on a Limb

I don't know what I become
Floating softly
Flying up
Like there's no more gravity
Body and mind
Different things

I don't know what I become
But I feel so good this time
From far-off I hear your cry
Floating softly
Split in two
I'm flying high

4. Summerland

Black procession in the rain
Lovely brand new hearse
Everyone cries
Everyone cares
Or maybe just pretends

Oh, it's your big moment, by the way

Cold at heart
Indifference
Thought they were your best friends
Tears & flowers
From the one
You never would expect

Oh, it's your big moment, by the way
Would you like to tell them something?

Do you remember what you said
When I looked into your eyes
For the first time
I know you're not quite ready yet
But there's nothing to be afraid of
In your Summerland.

On the wall
In the waiting room
Still life in a frame
At the end of the corridor
Someone screams your name

Oh, it's your big moment by the way
Would you like to tell him something?

Do you remember what you said
When I looked into your eyes
For the first time
I know you're not quite ready yet
But there's nothing to be afraid of
In your Summerland

5. Lunatic Soul

I can't describe what's going on with me
A different nature moving rapidly
Being halfway here
And halfway somewhere else

My whole life starts to flash in front of me
I'm overwhelmed in joy, quiet and peace
All words I know are three-dimensional
I feel all troubles are gone
I feel all troubles are gone

Timelessness,
Ineffability
I glimpse the spirits of my relatives
I see the others
The being of light
Shifting through a tunnel, long and dark

I regret all those things that I had left undone
And I wish I could fix everything that was wrong
I wish I could tell you how sorry I am
This is not the end
It's the start of something that I'm really scared of
That I'm scared to life
I'm scared to life
I'm scared to life
I'm scared to life

6. Where the Darkness is Deepest

(Instrumental)

7. Near Life Experience

(Instrumental)

8. Adrift

I know we're passing by
See the shadows of our own
Apart from where we are
We still believe
And raise our hopes
We're locked up alone
Going nowhere
Waiting for the dawn
And just like shooting stars
We sleep in flames
Until we burn up
Until we burn up

How many lives we live
Poised between all heaven and earth
How many times we die
Trying for rebirth with a different mask
No matter where we go
Souls adrift never say goodbye

9. The Final Truth

So easy to forget
Remove from consciousness
All instances
That used to be significant
I never thought those things
Would have such meaning
Until he asked me to
Give them back

What will survive of me
A cardboard box with thoughts inside
What will survive of me
My little escapes from real life
What will survive
And what will I take
To the land of endless ones

If I sever the past
It will be so dark here…

We want to be loved
Loved for what we are
We want to be saved
But our final truth depends on time

So what will survive of me
A cardboard box with thoughts inside
What will survive of me
My little escapes from real life
What will survive
And what will I take
To the land of endless ones

If I sever the past
It will be so dark here…

When I met The Ferryman
He smiled to me
Could swear I saw this smile before
"You have to choose" – he said
"And then you may return
You'll get another chance to revive
If you decide to keep
Your memories from the past
By all else, you must be forgotten
If you let me take your mind
If you let me take your soul
In their hearts you'll stay forever
Your choice

The time is now
At the crossroads of your afterlife
The part of you must be lost
Make up your mind
Choose the side
Pick the card
Throw the coin from your mouth
Cause the time is now
I'm calling you again
Let's see what color your rising sun will have this time"

10. Waiting for the Dawn

(Instrumental)